Denver Boudoir Photography – Selfies & REAL Beauty

Several of my clients, friends and family have sent me this video. Part of my Denver Boudoir Photography is working with ALL women to accept themselves as they are, right now, without having to “fix” something about themselves first. And make no mistake – I am VERY passionate about that, and take it very seriously! Because of the intimate nature of my primary portrait work, my clients must be 18 years old to partake in a boudoir session. There are zero exceptions to this. I have, however, worked with teens and pre-teens in work that is not intimate, but portrait work to capture who they are, and their beauty – right NOW.

Watching this video made me cry. Yes, I will admit that it definitely changed my perspective on selfies – previously I didn’t really care for them. I see a different side to them now, but that isn’t what brought tears to my eyes. Watching these girls focus on the perceived “flaws” makes me really, really sad.

“I hate my rosy cheeks. I hate my braces, I hate my glasses, I hate my whole face.”
My face is too round… my hair is too big…

The entire premise of the video is using the “selfie” to change a perspective about your own beauty – which is fantastic – but why the heck are these girls tearing themselves apart to begin with? It really makes me wonder where this comes from, and how to combat it. Yes, it is natural to compare yourself, and this age is a hard age because of so many changes happening. And yes, girls can be mean to each other – women can too. But is that really where this starts? Does it start with moms, passing this onto their daughters? The media? The skewed version of “sexuality” that our girls see every day?

My thoughts about the origination of negative self assessments also made me think about the women that I know that for the most part, don’t CARE about what others think or say about them. Where does that come from? Where does the confidence to accept yourself as you are, regardless of others’ opinions, sprout from?

Now THAT is an amazing skill, an asset that every girl needs to learn. Because let’s be real – life can suck. People can be mean sometimes. Being able to deal with some crappy situations and not internalize everything, and let it affect your self worth, is a skill that will be valuable for life.

It is my belief that we, as women, have a duty to the next generation to lift them up and teach them that their self worth is not dependent on others’ opinions.

The real question is, how can we make that happen?


If we spent as much time and effort thinking about the beauty we have right now instead of our perceived flaws, we could change the world.

Click to tweet that!

I’m curious, I would love to know your ideas. How can we teach confidence and self reliance in a way that affects our innermost being? Yes, there will always be mean people, and being confident doesn’t mean that negative situations won’t affect us. There are some situations that no matter how confident you might be, they will still tear you apart. But small remarks, little situations here and there – how can we model confidence and self assuredness for the next generation of girls?

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If you’d like to have more information about what the heck is going on with sessions, parties and more, click here to grab my Denver boudoir photography guide – How to Look Amazing in Photos. It has tips and tricks to help you look amazing in photos – whether your clothes are on or off – and avoid having to untag yourself in a social media photo again. Or, just laugh with me at various shenanigans and get early access to events, model calls, and awesome goings-on. Either way, come join the list. We have cocktails.

I am so privileged to be a top Denver boudoir photography specialist! My clients’ privacy is a top priority for these intimate portraits. Any and all boudoir images that are posted have been shared by the subject with written permission. I am honored that my clients choose to share their images with the world, and talk about their experiences with those images.

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