You Exist TOO, Mama! | Self Love Denver
Well hello there, beautiful. Yes, you. No, I’m not talking about someone behind you, reading over your shoulder. I’m talking about you, in your 4 day old sweatpants, mom bun on your head, can’t remember the last time you showered. Let’s talk about some self love k? And because a computer reads this too – weird but true – some self love Denver.
When was the last time you had a nice photo of yourself?
I’m not just talking about what I do, with professional photos, with a process and lots of prep. I’m talking about a lovely selfie, or a photo with your kids? Even if you have to ask a stranger to take it.
What, you don’t like the way you look in photos?
You don’t wear makeup every day? I’ve found sunglasses helps with that, by the way, and I may or may not have a HUGE collection for this reason.
I was there too, I totally feel you. I wear makeup maybe once a week, if I’m lucky. If I wear it when I’m photographing clients, it ends up all over my face, so it’s pretty rare that I put it on at all. And all of these makeup tutorial women that spend an hour and use 45 products? Yeah, right. I have two kids and two businesses, that’s just not going to happen every day. Or ever.
Self love Denver does NOT necessarily mean spending an hour on makeup, am I right?
Last year, we went on a dream cruise as a family. My daughter was 3, almost 4, and kept telling me how beautiful I was. It was a little disconcerting – I don’t think I wore makeup on the entire trip, and I pretty much lived in a bathing suit and sundress. Last year is the first year IN MY LIFE that I embraced a bikini on my plus size body, but that’s a story for another time. Suffice it to say, I definitely was not feeling the supermodel vibe, ready to hop in front of the camera. But we were in our stateroom and she REALLY wanted to take a photo of me. I kept telling her no, and finally gave up the fight and handed her the camera.
She took this photo.
Now, she was three years old at the time. And grabbed my little waterproof point and shoot that had been in the ocean all day, recording the fishes and turtles. So it’s not the best photo ever. But what I immediately noticed is that I have no makeup on. I look like I got roughed up by the mafia in a back alley because my undereye circles are so bad. I had been in the sun and look like someone sprayed me with a weird spray tan. The sunspot game was definitely strong.
But she took this photo and turned the camera around to see and immediately said “MOMMY you’re so beautiful, look!”
And I about died, right there, on the cruise ship. I was a Brooke puddle, in tears, telling her thank you.
I tell you all of this because I want to really hammer home the two different perspectives in this story.
Mine: I’m tired. I’ve been running around and enjoying myself and yes, having a TON of fun with sea turtles, but now I’m ready to just lie down and read for awhile. I look at myself and immediately think the worst. UGH. Look at those undereye circles. What is up with those weird spots on my forehead, when did those show up? My hair is greasy but do I really want to wash it when we will be in the ocean again tomorrow? Blah blah blah….
Hers: Mommy takes photos all the time, maybe I can do that too! OMG she just handed me her camera and said yes, which button do I push? Oh here it is, okay hold it very still like mommy does and… got it and OH MY GOD LOOK AT THIS AMAZING PHOTO THAT I TOOK OF MY MOMMY! SHE IS SO GORGEOUS, I WANT TO BE JUST LIKE HER WHEN I GET BIG!
I really don’t TRY to be morbid, I’m a very positive person, but the reality is that we just never know when we will leave this world. And when we do, the images that were taken while we were here will be a strong reminder of our lives. Our legacy. Our memories with our kiddos.
When we are gone from this world, those photos will be some of the most prized posesssions for the people who loved us most.
And here’s a truth bomb of glitter: they won’t care how you look in those photos, because they love you for YOU, not for how you look.
So let’s get back to you. Yep, back to the sweatpants and mom bun.
Really, there are a number of things we can put into that spot “before you were ___________.” Married. Their mom. A professional. Etc. We take on so many roles that sometimes, we forget ourselves.
And guess what – no matter what you look like, you matter. As a human. As you are.
When was the last time YOU were in a photo – no matter how you look? When was the last time that you took a selfie with your kids? Or asked a stranger to take a photo of you? Or even bigger for some of us – asked your PARTNER to take a photo of you?
These photos matter, no matter what you look like. Whether you have makeup on or not. Even if you have greasy hair.
Your kids want YOU. And one day, when they can’t have you because you are no longer on the planet, they will have those photos.
I’m not saying you have to be in every photo. Let’s be real, there are days when I don’t want to see the other side of a camera, I just feel blah and if someone tries to take a photo, I will be very grumpy. But let’s start making those days the exception, instead of the rule.
And if the kiddos really want a photo on one of those days, sunglasses are your friend. Trust me.
Get into those photos with your kids. Let your kids take photos of you. Ask strangers. Ask partners.
BE IN those photos mama. You matter, you exist too, and even though your kids might be your world right now and you want to take a million photos of them, remember that YOU are their world. Right now. As you are.
You definitely don’t NEED a boudoir session to remind yourself that you’re gorgeous and should be captured in photos regularly, but hey, if you feel that way, who am I to argue with that? ;)
Ready to book your session!? I’m excited to work with you! Click here to contact me and get more information about booking your self love Denver session with me!If you’d like to have more information about what the heck is going on with sessions, parties and more, click here to grab my self love Denver boudoir photography guide – How to Look Amazing in Photos. It has tips and tricks to help you look amazing in photos – whether your clothes are on or off – and avoid having to untag yourself in a social media photo again. Or, just laugh with me at various shenanigans and get early access to events, model calls, and awesome goings-on. Either way, come join the list. We have cocktails.
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